To Be or To Baby

Ya know, being a married- mid twenty-something woman, I get a lot of questions about when I am going to “start a family.” And I know its not just happening to me. I see it all around me in the few remaining married- non parent friends. Trust me people, we are feeling the pressure!
I read an article the other day stating that by the age of thirty, women have used 90% of their eggs. THAT is deluxe. Because your best eggs go first. So, people all around are telling me it’s time to have a baby, AND so is my body.
However, I’m just not ready. I know there are immeasurable joys to being a parent. I know my biological clock is ticking. But, I also know it is a huge sacrifice. And I see it all around me. I’m probably never going to do anything “great” for the world, but I know I could do something great for my family, and that is to have a baby. Uh, I don’t even like saying that. But it‘s the truth. The single greatest thing I may ever do for the world is to procreate. It is just because I am that insignificant in the spectrum of the universe. Which is fine.
It is all so much to take in. There are so many factors that affect my decision. First- the children I encounter. As an overall evaluation- I don’t want my child to act like them. There are some bad kids. And bad parents. But, I do see good kids also. In between the chaos. A lot of my friends have good kids, and they are good parents. And I will be a freak parent, I already have some pretty serious standards-especially when thinking about my child’s diet. If you know me you understand. There are a thousand factors in my mind that butt-heads with each other on this topic.
Some people just have babies on a whim without even having a plan. Some are completely unplanned. What they don’t tell you when you get pregnant in high school though, is that it was one of your BEST EGGS!!!!(I’m not condoning this by any means)
Anyway, I want a plan. For goodness sakes, it takes a lot of dinero to cover the cost of having a child. Plus the whole self-sacrifice thing pretty much throws me for a loop too. I just want to be ready, so that Cameron and I can be the best parents we can be.
Sometimes I think I should just go off the pill and let nature take its course. But that is pretty scary. What if it happened at a bad time. And, I mean with all the problems women have, one doesn’t even know if they are able to conceive. I know I want to have a baby someday, that is for certain. I love my Family and I know it would make my parents sooooo happy. But definitively not today, or tomorrow.
Anyway , the next time you go to say something to a married-fertile- non-parent women, think twice, cause trust me, its already crossed their mind.

P.S. For your viewing pleasure i have included some pictures of what mine and Cameron's baby may look like someday. I hope you LOL! xo